"My head is so round."

And here we are, already at the end of the month. Each day/month/year that passes as I get older, the more I realize that time does move fast. That is all the more reason to appreciate life and our surroundings. This week we heard some difficult news about a family member with cancer; I have never experienced anyone slowly growing sick with any type of disease and it is a heavy, learning experience. But through it all, my priorities have shifted and the friends and family that surround me are becoming all that more important. I have to admit I started to become a little lazy with my habits this week, but am not letting that hold me back! This week involved a lot of personal reflection, and overall I am grateful and happy with where my mindset is at.


Physical Strength

Technically, I worked out three times this week with one day of shoveling. My goal for the year is to work out on average four days a week, so I definitely felt a little guilty after this week. But, one of my friends got me out of the house to do a boxing class at TITLE Boxing Club with her and, I LOVED IT! I tend to shy away from work out classes because I dislike people yelling at me to exercise, but this was definitely a great stress release and I would love to do it again.


30 Minute Arms, Shoulders, Abs Growing Annanas

I found a new online workout for the week, and this one had my arms and abs burning. There are no repeat exercises in this routine, which keeps it interesting! I burned about 300 calories in this 30 minute workout.


Nutrition

As mentioned before, I have experimented with a variety of diets. For the most part, I do tend to shy away from red meat in particular (I have actually found it to cause inflammation in my knees!). My family gifted us some grass fed, organic ground beef though, so this week I had some meatballs and other amazing sources of protein!

  • Breakfast: Eggs and Avocado - healthy fats to start the morning!

  • Snack: Cranberry and Orange Breakfast Muffins from Oh She Glows - these little babies are protein packed, carb and sugar conscious, and tasty!

  • Lunch: Sticky Asian Meatballs by Health Little Peach, over veggies

  • Snack: Green Smoothie from Oh She Glows

Mental Strength: Quit Like a Woman

Holly Whitaker mentions all of the tools she used to battle through her abuse of drugs, alcohol, and eating disorders. I feel lucky in my life to have such great role models to look up to, because many of the things she listed that helped her, I have already started practicing. Here are a few tools she mentioned:

  • Yoga

  • Meditation

  • Therapy

  • Reducing time spent with people who are unsupportive

  • Self-Talk and Self-Love

Although I have not been completely sober for the month of January, I have handled alcohol in moderation during social events, and did other things in times I felt like drinking where it didn't "make sense" (bored on a Friday night at home, during the day at the mall, etc.). And for that, I am proud.

At this point, you might be wondering, "Where did the title 'my head is round' come from". Well - here is my story behind that. I work from home in a virtual setting, and once a month we have the entire department on a call which includes 90+ people, including leaders and the vice president of the department. During a side conversation I was having via chat, I typed to a co-worker that "my head is so round", but the message, in fact, did not go to my coworker but instead, to the chat for the entire meeting.

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For a brief moment, I panicked. No "undo" or "delete" button. No "retract" or "unsend". The message was out there for the entire department to see. The messages from my colleagues and even my leaders started coming in, and all we could do was laugh. I had to accept the situation and learn for next time.


I bring this up because last year if this were to have happened, I would have felt that panic for longer than a minute. I would have worried if people were judging me when that comment went through, or if it would hurt my reputation. But as I continue to practice gratitude, abundance, and knowing that there are far more extreme and horrible things to experience, I have finally started to live in a way that is not too serious. And in retrospect, I am starting to gain more confidence in just being myself. It is a fun process to have front row tickets for!


Spirituality

The 21 Day Meditation ended last week, but I was still noticing the impact from practicing meditation daily. I am searching for different meditation guides and resources either on Spotify or YouTube, so any recommendation is welcome!


As mentioned, this week was a heavy one and spiritual guidance felt more necessary than it has in a while. Sunday morning my significant other and I signed in to a virtual worship with River Valley Church, and wow was this service powerful. I do not think it was by chance that this service was part of a series focused around healing. Although the literal message was about lepers in the Bible, the underlying meaning was that healing is possible, and that Jesus is with you every step of the way. There were multiple tears shared between my partner and I that morning, to say the least.


Observing someone battling a sickness is not easy, and not only for that individual going through it. Family, friends, and the other people in that person's life suffer along side not knowing how to feel or react. Some days are good, and others are bad. But, and I am still learning and attempting to grasp this, it is important to keep hope. Hope that healing is possible. Hope that suffering is not unbearable. And maybe most importantly, hope that peace can be found and accepted.


2022 has been quite the year for lessons so far, and we are less than ten percent through with the year. Each day I practice being better, I become more accepting and loving of myself. Let's see what February has in store for me!